The Rambliest Blog Post

The Rambliest Blog Post…

I know I am supposed to start this blog conversation off with a fascinating introduction of myself and my life and all the incredibly exciting things I have done. But I feel like enough of that is already out there about me and that doing yet another post on my background is a bit of overkill. So can we just pretend that you already know all that stuff about me and start from right here in this moment where we are now?

I’m unsure what I really want this blog to be. I should probably define that for us all so you can make the choice as to whether you want to actually read on or not. I think mostly I would like to take you on an adventure into what a working artist’s life is like. I would like to share my art and creative practice with you as well as give you an insight into my day job running a busy Brisbane Art Gallery. Yeah. I think that is good for now. If I change my mind about that I will let you know.

So this month, has been a whirlwind so far. A lot is happening in my art life and my Gallery life. Let’s get some order into this and start with the Gallery. Last month saw a lot of changes in the street where the Gallery sits. Arthouse Northside (an art supply and picture framing store) moved in right next door to the Gallery. Firstly, I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. I actually work at the art store on my Wednesdays so it is very convenient for me on a number of levels (not that it is all about me, but this blog is!) Secondly, it has brought a lot of art lovers into the street who previously did not know the Gallery was there. Thirdly, it makes it MUCH easier to explain to people where to buy their art and hanging supplies from when they are right next door! Then Gourmet Cakes and Coffee (a café and gourmet cake shop moved into the street next to the art store, which also brought another whole other clientele of people down to this part of town that previously had not been there before. Therefore saying it was a busy month is kind of an understatement.

We switched out the exhibitions at the Gallery. I said goodbye to Liane’s exhibition and I was genuinely sad to see it go. Some exhibitions, especially when you are working with friends and incredible artists and genuinely lovely people really get to you. When I sit in the Gallery for these exhibitions, it feels less like my day job and more like I get to sit with these artworks that are more like conversations with my favourite people. Their ideas surround me on the walls and I get to have this insight into them on a significant level. So when we were bumping out Liane’s exhibition, I was quite emotionally low, even though I know another exhibition is coming and I am going to love it too. And the next exhibition came quickly. An hour after we finished bumping Floriography out, we bumped in the artists for the Threads exhibition, which is currently showing.

There is always so much to do with the Gallery. Even if you take away the physical work of hanging, behind the scenes there is always mountains of paperwork to be done – for the exhibition prior, for the current exhibition and for upcoming exhibitions. There are always decisions to be made, emails to be answered, meetings to be held and artists to consult with. The website alone is constant maintenance. Don’t even talk to me about the many different image sizes we need for the multiple avenues through which we send everything out into the world. So, by the time I get through one day’s list and compile the next day’s list, sometimes my creative brain has left the room in a sulk and doesn’t want to play anymore.

Which brings me to my own artist side of things. I have an exhibition to prepare for and am I freaking out like every other artist I have had to calm down who is preparing for an exhibition? ABSOLUTELY. I am like a deer caught in the headlights with the amount of work that needs doing for it and how I am going to get through it and the worry of pieces I have not yet quite resolved in my brain. I am tallying my finances and wondering how I am going to meet that burden of it. That sneaky little imposter syndrome voice likes to whisper snidely in my ear about how dare I think I could actually pull off a solo exhibition and that no-one is going to show up, nothing is going to sell and everyone will basically point and laugh and remind you of how you set yourself up for failure.

And yet…I still stubbornly show up. I show up in my studio and draw a little bit at a time until that voice calms down and it is just me and my pens rendering the images from my head, so my stories can have a life in the world. Or it is me surrounded by the smell of silk cut lino being carved, or the sound of ink being rolled out until it hits that perfect consistency or it is the way the paper pulls away from that print to reveal an image that is so exactly right it resonates somewhere deep inside. It is me, captain of my press, driving the wheel and the rollers and the plate, surrounded by love and faith of the people who thought I WAS good enough and deserving enough and worthy enough.

And so, it is me in my studio, shutting out the sounds and the worries and the frantic pace of the world and knowing that it will take as long as it takes and that is ok. Empires won’t fall. Lives won’t be destroyed. I am not hurting anyone. So I do exactly what I tell other artists to do.

I breathe.

I make art.

And I let the joy and peace of that take the seat at my table that anxiety and worry just vacated.